Is the grass really greener on the other side? How to let go of comparing yourself to others:
July 14, 20222 min read
'The grass is always greener on the other side.' - a saying we've all heard before.
But what does it actually mean when you believe that other's peoples' grass is greener?:
it seems like other people are in a better situation than you
you can't focus on what you already have, because you're always wondering about the next 'better or bigger' thing - It’s never enough.
Clearly, it seems that we humans have the tendency to compare ourselves to others and believe that they are simply better off than us - even if this isn't the case.. Most of the time, we only see what people want us to see, we only get a glimpse of their lives and those are most likely going to be positive. Research has found that we mainly only share the positive moments of our lives with others, especially when it comes to social media & this 'social media highlight-reel effect' can really affect the way we perceive others' lives. This may lead us to think other peoples' lives are better than what they might actually be and conversely, make us feel worse about our own lives. However, we need to remember that we are prone to coming to this unfounded conclusion and that we might not know their hardships or struggles - basically, none of us have it all figured out.
It has been suggested that, as we are constantly being showered with information and advertisements, we can start to feel restless and the endless array of choices keeps us looking for 'more'. It can feel as if we’re wasting our lives if we’re not doing something more important - but even that could just be our 'grass is greener' thinking making itself known.
How can we go against this mindset?
Being in the present moment.
Feeling grateful for what we already have and what we have 'achieved'.
Enjoying what is happening right now - or at least making the best out of it.
Doing this can help you come back to feeling more at ease, less stressed and give you a less biased view on the world.
Feeling grateful for what we already have is just as important as feeling grateful for who we are: our insecurities and worries often lead to us thinking we are doing worse than we actually are. Go easy on yourself - you're doing your best.
Maybe we don't need to 'compete' with others and compare ourselves - what if there is enough space for all of us to go for what we want.
What if we focused on watering our own grass instead of wondering whether other peoples' grass is greener?